![]() First, dinosaurs get attacked by aliens, then a tony blonde finds something in the Arctic that will “change our view of the history of the world,” and then a younger blonde in short-shorts opens her mail while the camera hugs her butt and ex-CIA agent Kelsey Grammer holds forth (in a Dick Cheney drone) on the need to protect mankind by wiping out Transformers - including the ones who’d saved the Earth in the previous three installments. The kindest thing I can say about the script is that it’s incoherent. But Transformers: Age of Extinction is nearly three %$^&%!!# hours, and they’re brain-freezing.Įhren Kruger is credited with the screenplay, and if I were him, I’d have gone with a pseudonym - say, Optimus Prime. I thought the third Transformers film and last year’s satirical crime movie Pain and Gain were cruelly underrated, the former positively engorged with invention, the latter a droll satire in love with its own sleaze. But as my longtime readers know, I kinda … sorta … like him. Many cinephiles believe that director Michael Bay represents the End of Movies, and it’s true that two words sum up his touch in the Hasbro-affiliated Transformers series: bloat and chop.
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